Sunday, December 6, 2009

Marley's Ghost - A Short Story



“It is required of every man,’ the Ghost returned, ‘that the spirit within him should walk abroad among his fellow-men, and travel far and wide; and if that spirit goes not forth in life, it is condemned to do so after death. It is doomed to wander through the world-oh, woe is me!-and witness what it cannot share, but might have shared on earth, and turned to happiness.’

- Jacob Marley

‘Business!’ cried the Ghost, wringing its hands again. ‘Mankind was my business. The common welfare was my business; charity, mercy, forbearance, and benevolence, were, all, my business. The dealings of my trade were but a drop of water in the comprehensive ocean of my business!’ It held up its chain at arm’s length, as if that were the cause of all its unavailing grief, and flung it heavily upon the ground again.

- Jacob Marley









The story of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol


The tale of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol begins on Christmas Eve seven years after the death of Ebenezer Scrooge's business partner Jacob Marley. That night, the ghost of Jacob Marley appears before Scrooge. He is chained by steel cash-boxes, keys, padlocks, ledgers, deeds and heavy purses. He wears a bandage of sorts around his chin and tied on top of his head. Marley warns Scrooge that his soul will bear heavier chains for eternity if he does not change his greedy ways, and also predicts that a series of other ghosts will follow. The Ghost floats back out to the bleak dark night, a night that is filled with restless, wailing phantoms and this is the last we see of him.


Three Christmas ghosts visit Scrooge during the course of the night, fulfilling Marley's prophecy. The first, the Ghost of Christmas Past, takes Scrooge to the scenes of his boyhood and youth which stir the old skinflint's gentle and tender side. The second spirit, the Ghost of Christmas Present, takes Scrooge to the home of his nephew Fred to observe his game of Yes and No and to the humble dwelling of his clerk Bob Cratchit to observe his Christmas dinner. Here it is clear to Scrooge that Bob’s youngest child, the crippled Tiny Tim is not doing well at all. The third spirit, the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come, harrows Scrooge with dire visions of the future if he does not learn and act upon what he has witnessed. Among the visions is the death of Tiny Tim, and Scrooge’s own lonely death.


When Scrooge wakes up on Christmas morning he is a changed man. Tiny Tim does not die as the ghost foretold. Scrooge goes about treating his fellow men with kindness, generosity, and compassion, and gains a reputation as a man who embodies the spirit of Christmas.





MARLEY’S GHOST
by
Doug Macphisto

arley wept.

He found himself walking past the old counting house, dragging his chains of steel cash-boxes, keys, padlocks, ledgers, deeds and heavy purses. Were he still alive, his muscles would have strengthened, thus making the load he carried more manageable. But Jacob Marley was not alive. And such was the nature of this realm that the burden never lessened. The poor Ghost walked for eternity, a silent witness, in a world of tenderness that he himself denied in life.

Often he would thrash about waving and swinging his chains and locks about, whilst witnessing even the smallest acts of kindness. A man opening a door for a stranger; a tip of a gentleman’s hat to a passing lady. Yes, Marley would scream through his bandaged-closed mouth for hours at such a sight.

Once, not so long ago (that is if such a thing as time existed), he was witness to a man and woman holding a newborn child, swaddled in blankets. It had seemed to Marley that the mother’s kisses were ever so tender and the father’s hand, resting on the babe’s head, was ever-so-light. Over this he screamed for what have been weeks to you or I.

And then he returned to his wandering, back down the streets of London, back to the counting house where his partner and only friend in life, Ebenezer Scrooge, had their business. The business of forging chains.

It seemed to Marley at that moment he had not seen Ebenezer in quite some time. No, he had not been at his home, neither was he at his regular melancholy tavern nor anywhere else that Marley could see. Now, why does that seem so strange? The old Ghost thought.

Marley gathered his chains once more and once gathered, he took a step forward.

And was stopped cold.

His chains clinked softly. With vacant, unseeing eyes, Marley gathered his chains again and marched forth.

Once more he was stopped without taking a single step.

A third attempt was just as fruitless.

He tried again and again. And after that he tried a dozen more times. It was as though it had only ever happened a single time. At some point, Marley finally looked behind him, down the winding length of chain to a single cash-box wrapped around a warmly glowing lamp post at waist height. It is fair to say that this post was the only warm looking thing in all of this dark and dismal land of shadow.

This was the sight that brought Marley to his present state of weeping. A tiny crushed mouse sounded less pitiful than his cries.

Marley had passed through buildings and people without a single reaction. Why now should his burden be wound around this particular post? But that was the very nature of this world, was it not? There were no rules in such a place, a place of torment. In fact, Marley had already convinced himself that if anything at all could make his misery more…well, miserable, it was sure to happen.

Still weeping, the ghost gathered his chains and gave them what we would call a meaningful tug. He shook them and rattled them, he pulled with all of his will (which admittedly, was very little). Exhausted, Marley threw down his chains and howled through his tightly-clamped mouth.

Passing spirits joined in, like a gaggle of lunatics. Some screamed at him for disturbing them, others screamed just to drown him out. Other’s screamed because no pain or frustration could possibly be greater than their own, or so they thought. Those were the loudest of the bunch.

“Leave me be,” Marley cried through clenched teeth. “Bother me no more.”

To which the surrounded crowd of ghosts replied: “Leave me be. Bother me no more.”

Every curse and every moan from Marley’s dead lips were mimicked in kind by the horde. Marley stood there and continued to weep. Simply stood there. The poor fellow didn’t even have the good sense to lie down and rest a moment. Eventually the ghosts wandered away, one by one, leaving Marley alone again silent and as still as a dead wind.

A giggle made him stir. A soft giggle and a voice that said:

“Jacob Marley, why do you linger here so?”

At first it sounded like the giggle of a very small child, but then, to Marley at least, it also sounded like his own laugh. When he was alive, it was an extremely rare moment to catch Jacob Marley laughing. And if he did it was usually over seeing an old woman topple over on the sidewalk, or after racking his cane on the hindquarters of some young child racing by. A cruel laugh to be sure, but this giggle sounded like his own had it known to laugh without being at another’s expense.

Laughter, the ghost thought. He had not thought of his own laughter, not once, since he had passed away. Oh, he was witness to much laughter wandering these lost streets of lost souls. Children playing, adults making merry at a Christmas party; never able to join in. But his own laughter? No, there had been only wailing and thrashing about.

Christmas, he wondered. Now what did that remind him of?

“I know that laugh,” he moaned, “Ebenezer.”

Turning he saw his old partner, Ebenezer Scrooge standing beneath the lamp post, the very lamp his chain was inexplicably wrapped around, tethered and drifting in the darkness. Of course the post was the very post that sat just outside of the old Scrooge and Marley counting house.

“Ebenezer,” Marley whispered through clenched teeth, blank eyes twitching. “I have searched for you these many days.” A confused look came over his face. “Why have I not seen you?”

“Why do you weep?” came a voice from Ebenezer that clearly did not belong to him. Marley did not recognize the voice, and he suspected now that he did not recognize this apparition.

“I weep for what I have lost. For what I had never gained, nor reached for in life.”

“Will you not come closer, Jacob?” said the apparition who no longer looked like Mr. Scrooge. As it spoke its features changed like melting wax. For a moment Marley could see spectacles resting on a forehead, and then it seemed he could see a small child. But mostly it was a shimmering form of light. Not the same light coming from the post, but a whiteness that was often hard to look at directly.

“Will you not come closer, Jacob?” the spirit repeated.

“I shall,” mumbled Marley gathering his chain and shuffling forward. When Marley stopped, it was just outside of the circle of light and the spirit giggled again.

“Come, remove your kerchief and speak freely.”

Marley stood and stared with his chains gathered in his arms. “It is not permitted.”

A ghost passed by just then and thinking Marley had spoken to him said: “You don‘t own this walkway. Leave me be. Leave me be.” Marley did not meet the passer-by’s eyes. The ghost peered at Marley, and then at the lamp post. Seeing nothing at all of interest in both locations, the ghost continued along his sad way, mumbling to himself.

When they were quite alone again, the voice said with a smile: “Not permitted? You did so once before.”

This struck Marley with such a force, his body and chains quivered at the mere thought of it. “Before?”

The chains lightly chimed and then drew still.

“You haven’t forgotten have you? You did it once before. Do you not recollect?”

“I…I…yes…I…once. No. No! I do not recall.”

“Do you remember his bedroom Jacob? That special night? Who was it you spoke to?”

For a moment the specter looked like Ebenezer Scrooge again.

“Yes, yes, you do remember, don’t you?”

“Ebenezer I have searched for you these many days. Why have I not seen you?”

The specter floated forward, completely featureless now. Marley gasped at the spirit’s approach. The soft warm beauty of the spirit, squeezed a single tear from Marley’s eyes. This spirit was the only warmth Marley had ever experienced since passing away. It was like the first ray of spring sunlight that brings about the end of a snowy winter.

The glow of the spirit pressed against Marley’s features.

“Won’t you undo your kerchief?”

Lips trembling, milky-white eyes frantically searching to focus on something other than the light, Marley spoke through his clenched teeth: “It is not…permitted.”

“Who governs this rule?”

“Penance governs over me and my kind. Penance and her sisters Justice and Truth.”

Like a wickless flame, the spirit retreated away from Marley, back under the lamp. “You have already done your Penance Jacob. Surely you have not failed to remember this as well?”

Marley stammered.

“Yes, you remember this place.”

The ghost and the spirit now stood apart from each other in a bedchamber that had two sitting chairs facing each other in front of a fireplace.

“Ebenezer? Where are you?” Marley looked about the room and then turned back to the spirit. “Where has my old friend vanished to?”

The spirit floated over to the door that was double-locked. “It was not his custom to lock his bedchamber’s door. Yet he did so on that night. He was not keeping the world locked outside. Ebenezer kept his heart locked away from himself. You entered through here, do you not recall?”

Marley shifted his feet to look at the door, dragging his chains to the very spot he spoke with Ebenezer.

“Undo your kerchief, Jacob, so we can speak more openly to each other.”

Marley’s mouth quivered. “Do you command this thing of me?”

The spirit answered with a soft giggle.

With great care, the old ghost reached above his head and undid the knotted kerchief. On the other side, in life, these kerchiefs were used on corpses to keep their mouths from suddenly and quite unexpectedly popping open. Marley’s mouth opened with an audible pop.

The spirit came forth, shining on the side of Marley’s face.

“Come and sit with me,” the light glided across the room and came to rest on the chair furthest away. Marley did not move.

“Can you sit down?” the voice asked.

“I can.”

Still Marley did not move.

“Why do you still stand there, my friend?”

“It is too late for me. I forged these chains in life and in death I am bound to them. This is my Penance and I willingly carry this burden as Justice demands.”

The bedchamber quickly melted away at that and the ghost found himself once again tethered to the post, still at the edge of darkness.

“That does not sound very just to me,” giggled the spirit.

“That is not for me to judge. Justice is impartial, as was my attitude toward my fellow man. Justice is fair. If it is seemingly unfair, it is because one is deserving of it.”

“Who was it that sent you to your friend Ebenezer that night, so very long ago?”

Marley’s milky-white eyes searched. “I was sent as part of my penance.”

“Yes Jacob Marley, so have you said.” The spirit floated around, closer to the edge of darkness. “Who was it that sent you?”

Panicked, searching, sightless eyes. The links of chains clinked with struggle. Frustration at having no answer.

“I was sent as part of my penance.”

“My, you are a stubborn one Jacob Marley. Very stubborn indeed.”

Marley raised his right arm showing a particularly heavy box of metal. “Stubbornness,” he said and lowered his arm. His left he raised raising a heavy padlock with it and said: “Indifference.” Lowering it Marley kicked at a ledger resting at his feet. “Cruelty. There are so many more.”

“Do you know how it was you came to him that night?”

Marley shook his head, ever so slowly, chains crinkling. “I do not. I was sent as…”

The spirit waived a hand of dismissal. “Yes, yes, as part of your Penance. I have grown quite weary of that refrain.” It said this with a bright smile and not as snide as you would immediately think. Nor was there anything reproachful about it.

“Tell me of that night Jacob. What thoughts played in your mind?”

Marley turned to the sign of the counting house as his thoughts turned back to that night. His mouth moved fish-like without a sound. He stammered and gripped his chains.

“I observed Ebenezer from the hour of his awakening through his daily dealings. His shameful treatment of Cratchit. Yet in his manner I saw only myself and it seemed to me my chains were heavier on that day. Yes, my heart was as heavy as steel. Yet my burden seemed light compared to this man who was my partner in life. Ebenezer had been an eager student and I was his teacher.”

Marley howled and thrashed about his accessories with great vigor. “His own chains, chains he himself could not see, were like the gong of a bell tower in my ears. It was the din of his tragic orchestra that called to me.”

The spirit came closer, pushing away a little of the shadow on Marley’s face so that now only his back was to the dark. “So you were not sent after all?”

The old ghost took no heed, lost in the torment of his memories.

“Those chains called to me and I was filled with pity. I could not turn myself away. Poor, old and alone and miserly Ebenezer. Wholly unaware of his burden. I fear he was quite terrified when I entered his chambers. Yes, I recall now. It was the three ghosts who sent me. The Trinity of Past, Present and Yet to Come. They bade me speak to this wretched creature.”

The spirit whispered around to Marley’s back. “It is said that man has three faces, Jacob. Mind, Body and Spirit. The Body is always concerned with the past. Its bruises and cuts. The Mind always frets about the future, about what may or may not be. Oh, shall I ever have enough? And the Spirit is ever present. Ever-now.”

Marley’s eyes widened in fear. “Spirit? Where have you gone? I cannot see you.”

With another giggle, the spirit came around and gave color to Marley’s face.

“It was Ebenezer who called for me and I answered.”

“Mayhap there is a third possibility, Jacob.”

“My time was short,” continued Marley, “and in my rage I demanded from him whether he believed in me or not. The Three Ghosts whispered to me, passing along their chance and hope. Daresay, I was glad for their words. Alas, my Fate does not allow such gladness for long.”

Something in the distance caught Marley’s eye and he reached out with a hand and walked in its direction, chains dragging behind him.

“Ebenezer I have searched for you these many days, why have I not seen you?”
The slack of his chain came tight and still tethered to the lamp post, it yanked Marley backwards. Whatever he thought he saw in that moment disappeared altogether.

He stood now on the opposite side of the circle of light. Away from the spirit and peering into darkness. The spirit floated closer, only a hands length away. The darkness between, however, could have been just a sliver, yet still it would make for an unfathomable abyss between them.

“What happened next, Jacob?”

The old Ghost looked this way and that, hearing, but not seeing. Marley took hold of each end of his bandage and brought it beneath his chin.

“The time given to me has expired.”

The two ends of the kerchief were brought together atop his head.

“I bid thee farewell.”

“Jacob, no, you must not…” the spirit reached out shining its light on Marley‘s back, but it did not touch Marley.

The old Ghost hesitated and then roped one end of the wrapper over the other.

“Jacob…”

Once more he hesitated, looking around with his blank eyes. At last he tightened the two ends and his mouth clamped together with a snap.

“Jacob…”

Marley took a step to return to his endless wanderings. The chain snagged and he stumbled back two steps so that now his back was in the glow of the lamp light.

“Jacob Marley? Why do you linger here so?”

And Marley mumbled as if well-rehearsed: “It is required of every man that the spirit within him should walk abroad among his fellow-men, and travel far and wide; and if that spirit goes not forth in life, it is condemned to do so after death. It is doomed to wander through the world and witness what it cannot share, but might have shared on earth, and turned to happiness.”

“Required? Required by whom?” said the spirit, gliding in closer and spiralling around Marley’s form.

“The one who shackled me and gave me the means to forge these chains. It is enough to know that it is required. Fare thee well spirit.”

Marley went to walk again and felt that all-too familiar tug. He turned and walked in a different direction this time, dragging his chains along until it snagged again.

“Why Jacob? Why do you linger here? What holds you so?”

The old Ghost raised the single chain that is wrapped around the post and shakes it violently. “My burden has become ensnared around that lamp.”

Leaving Marley for the moment, the spirit went over to the post and studied it very carefully.

“I am very sorry to say I see nothing here that shackles you dear Jacob.”

“Notwithstanding, I remain ensnared.” He rattled his chain to prove his point.

“I see nothing here at the light.”

Grim-faced, Marley pulls on his chain to show the tension in the links.

“How is it that you speak so freely now?”

The kerchief that he himself had tied only a moment ago, indeed had somehow come undone without poor Marley realizing.

“I…I…”

“Will you not come and see for yourself there is nothing here, Jacob?”

A loud screech filled the air, another damned soul passing over. Marley’s hands jerked at the sound of it, his face frozen in terror. As if to escape the howling, wailing voice, the old Ghost shuffled forward. Standing beneath the post, he still hears that terrible wailing.

“I know those cries all too well.”

“Be not afraid, my friend. Here, come see.”

Marley looked and saw just what he had always seen.

“It is as I expected. The chain is fastened to the post.” A pitiful cry escaped his lips. “Why do you torment me, spirit?”

Marley gave the chain a yank and then heaved a sigh. “I am not even free to wander.” What little freedom he had roaming these streets had just been taken away from him. The old Ghost could see that he was doomed to stand in this one spot for the rest of eternity; at the mercy of any passing ghost.

“Is that all you see poor, poor Jacob?”

Marley gave the spirit a slow, somber kind of a nod. For a while Marley’s eyes did not leave the spot where his chain was neatly tied.

Without the need for clocks and time and such things in that world, it would be difficult to say just how long they stood there staring at the chain. Seemingly it would have felt like months to you or I, so it would suffice to say a great moment of silence ensued.

“Who are you spirit?” Marley asked.

The spirit flashed a bright and gay smile and gave what not even Marley could argue as a good natured laugh.

The hand of the spirit gently touched Marley on the arm. The old ghost reacted as though stung. An image flashed before his tired eyes. It was not a chain at all that was tied to the post, but a gnarled talon, gripping with all of its might. Marley was convinced the hand belonged to a daemon. And that hand was his doom.

“Look again, dear friend.”

“Forgive me Ebenezer. I dare not.”

“Ebenezer has been gone these many years, dear Jacob. Come, look again my good fellow.”

The daemon’s hand flashed before his vision once again sending Marley into a howling fit. He nearly dropped to his knees at the sight such was his terror. His chin he buried into his chest.
The spirit’s glowing hand reached under Marley’s chin and gently lifted his chin up. “Look…” it whispered.

It was no daemon’s claw keeping him tethered, but his own Ghostly hand. It was his own arm that slightly bent at the elbow Marley had mistaken as a loosely hanging chain.

“Look…” the spirit pointed to Marley’s chest.

The chains that once criss-crossed over his chest were now gone. In their place were arms of light, holding him softly.

Marley slowly lifted his arms, feeling for the first time the weightlessness of them, or rather not feeling anything at all which is far better than those dreadful steel boxes. Tears filled his eyes yet again.

“They were never chains Jacob.”

“Who are you spirit? If you are not Ebenezer, I know naught who you might be.”

“Look…”

Jacob Marley wept.

And there, standing before him was his own self. He looked just the way he did the day he died. Spectacles resting on his brow, his usual waistcoat, tights and boots. There was no ghostly white about him. This was Marley with true color to his cheeks. And he was smiling. It was then that Marley discovered his face, when smiling, was quite beautiful.

Marley went over to the vision of his own self, arms open for an embrace and just like that the vision and the spirit was gone. He stood alone now. For a moment, a frightfully terrifying moment, Marley thought he had been tricked and this was just another cruel torment he was forced to bear. But when old Marley looked at his own outstretched hands, he saw the warmth in them, the color that had been lacking for so long. He looked himself over and was overjoyed to see that the chains were still gone. His ghostly hue but a terrible memory.

It had been himself all along. It was his arm and hand that had clamped down on the lamp post. The chains across his chest were his very own arms (and if this seems quite impossible to be holding your own self from behind, just remember what Ebenezer Scrooge once said: They (the spirits that is) can do anything they like. Of course they can. Of course they can.)

Marley laughed heartily at this. And his eyes were full of happy tears.

“Nay,” he said to himself, “Tears are never happy. ‘Tis joy and love that pushes out the sadness and bitterness of life. Like a pocket of air rising in the water.”


The light of the lamp post grew wider and wider, until finally it shone across every building and every thoroughfare. Marley was still surrounded by other ghosts, but they too were warm in color and not at all bothered by his laughter. In fact, passer-by’s would good-naturedly join in with him.

And Jacob Marley wept no more.







AUTHOR’S NOTE:

When the idea for this story came to me, I pictured Jacob Marley wandering through the streets of Charles Dickens’ London for centuries. But it is just as possible that this story takes place immediately after the events of A Christmas Carol.

Each time I have encountered the story of Ebenezer Scrooge, no matter in what form, I am always struck by how completely unfair it is to poor Jacob Marley to never be free of his torment. The idea of being condemned for all eternity (clearly a Christian concept) just doesn’t hold water with me since it is lacking completely in compassion. I always felt terribly sad for poor Marley who was instrumental in Scrooge‘s salvation. As I said, it was unfair that he was not rewarded for stepping in when he did.

And so my mind would always wander out the window of Ebenezer’s bedroom, in pursuit of Jacob Marley. Where was he? What was he up to now? And what if this story picks up sometime after Ebenezer Scrooge has finally passed away and would presumably be in heaven and therefore out of reach to Marley?

To my surprise I found him still wandering the streets of 1800 London completely alone with not even Scrooge to follow about. It seemed to me that redemption as told in all of the great mythical stories (including the Bible) is available only by turning inward. It is not a place that is separate from here and now. It is available here and now and available to everyone. It was not God’s judgement that sentenced Marley to Purgatory, it was Marley who condemned himself and thereby acted as his own savior.

Everybody loves the story of Ebenezer Scrooge’s redemption. It is up there with George Bailey and Anakin Skywalker! But I would ask that you spare a thought for poor old Jacob Marley this season for he would tell you that God does not judge and does not condemn man for his ‘sins’. Those are inventions of man.

Merry Christmas!

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Poor, Poor Judas

Poor, Poor Judas


“In the garden I was playing the tart
I kissed your lips and broke your heart
You, you were acting like it was the end of the world.”

- U2 “Until the End of the World”
( a song written from the point of view of Judas)



Poor, poor Judas. Christians often talk about how sad Jesus is at the state of the world. How he weeps because of the pain and suffering that makes up this physical realm. Let us ignore the fact (for the purpose of this blog) that this reveals more about how Christians view the world, than Jesus would view the world. And yet despite this great sadness, I can think of one who must be filled with greater sadness.

Poor, poor Judas.

Imagine being the one to betray the Messiah. The one who filled with guilt over his deed, did not even keep the thirty pieces of silver, committed suicide. And imagine that for all history your name would be cursed and hated. Imagine the weight of this guilt. Imagine the sadness heaped upon the shoulders of this one poor soul. Now consider this, if you were that man, this essential character in this Divine Tragedy, could you find forgiveness for your own self? Can you imagine anyone more sad than Judas Iscariot?

Has anyone, with the exception of perhaps Lucifer (see my last blog), in the history of mankind been judged so harshly? Is there anyone out there that feels any sympathy for this man? Why is it, that he sacrificed himself (and died hanging on a tree just like the man he betrayed) to be viewed by most people as most assuredly to be burning in hell?

What most people miss is the fact that without Judas, there would be no Saviour. Just like you cannot have heat without cold. I suppose that if it wasn’t Judas it would have been someone else, but the fact remains that it was Judas. Judas was instrumental in Jesus’ final message, a message that not only required his death, but his resurrection (again we will ignore the fact that I see the death and resurrection as a metaphor and not historical fact). Without Judas, there would have been no death or resurrection. No message at all. And one must wonder, what would have become of Jesus had he not died the way he did? His story would certainly not have become as important as it has become. He would have been another obscure prophet in a long line of wise men. Forgotten by history, by time.

It was the betrayal that brought the message into sharp focus, making the rest of the story possible. Quite the large responsibility, don’t you think? Would you have been capable of such a thing?


Prior to the infamous kiss of betrayal, Jesus is reported to have been praying in the Garden of Gethsemane. As the story goes, Jesus appears to have foreknowledge of the horrors that await him. Although willing to go through with it Jesus does ask that this task be taken away from him. This suggests that even Jesus felt fear. Perhaps doubt. And if the responsibility lay completely on his shoulders to complete this task, would he have been able to do it without Judas?

It is far too easy to yank on the rope that Judas put around his neck and keep him tied down and burning in the bowels of hell. One must consider some very interesting points in the entire arc of the story of Jesus. Jesus chose disciples and given his uncanny ability to know things beforehand, you must ask why he chose such a man? Was he chosen to fulfill the very role he ended up playing? It is suggested in the gospels that Judas had a weakness for money, and was also responsible for holding the disciples’ money bag. It also states in the Gospel of Luke that Satan entered Judas. Ah yes, the Adversary. And let us not forget that another name for Satan, is Lucifer, meaning “light-bringer”. Without darkness you cannot have light.

Jesus even calls Judas out during the Last Supper: "One of you will betray me". So why did Jesus trust this man, knowing he was the one to betray him? One interpretation of the events is that Jesus may have asked Judas to betray him. This idea is explored in Nikos Kazantzakis’ novel ‘The Last Temptation of Christ‘. Which I think is a more realistic approach to the story. That the man, Jesus, did not have the strength to follow through with his duty and chose someone who could force him to do it. Someone with more strength and courage than any man.

The Gospel of John tells a story of a woman who anoints Jesus with expensive perfume and washed his feet with her tears. Judas protests arguing that the money spent on the perfume could have been given to the poor. It would seem that Judas’ heart is in the right place. But Judas is rebuked and by stark contrast, he accepts thirty pieces of silver for turning over Jesus to the High Priests.

Judas is a story of weakness to be sure. The debate is over who truly was the weak one? He symbolizes every person, what people do when faced with temptation. He is a symbolic prostitute, accepting money for physical acts. Does he not center out Jesus with a kiss (an intimate act)? He shows us just how hard we are on our own selves. How quickly we move to judge and condemnation - not of others, but of ourselves.

Poor, poor Judas.

If you are to hate Judas, then you are to hate all dichotomies. To deny Judas, is to deny the message of the resurrection. To hate death, denies life.

There is an old Taoist proverb that describes perfectly this relationship of Judas and Jesus.

"It is the space between the bars that holds the tiger in.”

You see a cage is not made only of the physical aspects - the floor, the ceiling, the bars. It is also made of the spaces between those bars. If you had no spaces, they would not be bars, but walls. Without the spaces, the cage is transformed into something entirely different. It is no longer a cage.

Without Judas, Jesus is no longer a hero.


Saturday, September 12, 2009

Have Some Sympathy

Have Some Sympathy

“Pleased to meet you Hope you guessed my name,
But what’s confusing you
Is just the nature of my game
Just as every cop is a criminal
And all the sinners saints
As heads is tails

Just call me Lucifer

Cause I'm in need of some restraint

So if you meet me

Have some courtesy
Have some sympathy,
and some taste
Use all your we
ll-learned politesse
Or I'll lay your soul to waste…”
- Rolling Stones, “Sympathy for the Devil”

When thinking of the Fall of Satan most people immediately quote the story that is actually from Milton’s Paradise Lost. And the story of his fall doesn’t even occur in the bible. Most people don’t know this. Revelation makes inference to it, as do other books of the bible, but there is not one book that recounts this story. They do know that Satan was an archangel full of pride who would not do what God commanded (which was to bow down to man). But this story is actually from the Qur’an and in fact Iblis (as he is called) is not an angel, but a Jinn. A creature made with free will, like man. According to legend, angels do not have free will. Sounds to me like God has surrounded himself with yes men like some insecure egomaniac and anyone who doesn’t agree with him (yes sir!) is thrown into some lake of fire (or worse, Earth).

I admit, I do laugh when Christians recite this story, not realizing it isn’t even in their book, but what they are telling is a hybrid between a work of literary fiction and part of one of their most hated enemies’ sacred text.


But enough religion bashing. There is a point to all of this.



I find it interesting that Lucifer means “light-bearer” or “light-bringer”. Strange name for evil is it not? And yet the name Satan means “The Accuser” or “The Adversary”. It seems to me that any adversary plays an essential role in anyone’s life. Is not growth a painful experience? Do we not refer to it as growing pains? Especially Spiritual Growth. You cannot fully appreciate Spring without Winter. Do not seeds fight against the cold to grow again? Is not the hibernation period just as important as the period of bloom?

If everything was painted the same colour, let’s say green, nothing would have any meaning. If your clothes were all green, and your skin all the same shade of green on a backdrop of green, where then is the contrast?

If you’ve read my earlier blogs, Original Sin and More Original Sin, you will understand that the name Lucifer fits right in with the idea of the Serpent in Genesis as the hero of the story. This “light-bringer” is the one who introduced us to knowledge. To growth. To dichotomies. God made it all, but it was the serpent who pointed it out.

As for the story of Satan’s fall, God made Adam the first human. God then commanded all of the angels to bow down before man. And Iblis, full of “hubris and jealousy” refused to obey God’s command seeing Adam as being inferior in creation as he was made from clay and Iblis was made of fire. (Fire is always an interesting symbol - it gives off warmth and pushes back the shadow). And the punishment for disobeying? That his punishment will be delayed until the Day of Judgement. And in the meantime, Iblis has made it his personal vendetta to divert as many of Adam’s descendants away from God.

Sounds like a jilted lover to me. ("Hell hath no fury....")

But the real question here is: who is the jilted lover?

Forget Satan’s so-called pride and hubris, let us look at the real reason Satan would not bow down before man. Is not one of the ten commandments, “Do not have any other gods before me”? And somehow, Lucifer is condemned to Hell for obeying this law? For not idolizing man before God? Oh sure, as man we think we ARE superior, so of course we’ve made Lucifer the bad guy. Our ego’s simply can not handle anything else.

But think for a moment, how strong was Satan’s love for God? To not only disobey, but to risk eternal damnation. To be without his one true love? To be punished so severely, as he would never be with God again. Tell me, would you risk hellfire, for your love of something?

Does this mean I’m a Satanist? That I’m all for the ritual sacrifice of babies? Pentagrams and burning candles (there’s that fire and light again!)? The Macphisto in me says yes I am. Did God not ritually sacrifice his own son? Do we not light candles during mass? I’ve heard a lot of Christians talk about evil and to be ever on guard and so on. I remember asking one of these people, is God capable of forgiving Satan? They answered yes, but Satan has to be willing to be forgiven. I replied: “Really? And what about Grace? Undeserved kindness?” Answer: Silence.

Perhaps it is God who should apologize. “What? God apologize? Are you crazy?” Perhaps. But I am not talking about God per se, but people’s perception of Him. Here is the definition of hubris: overweening pride, haughtiness, or arrogance. In ancient Greece, hubris referred to actions which, intentionally or not, shamed and humiliated the victim. Who is the victim in this story? God? I don’t think so, God cannot be anyone’s victim. According to the story and this definition, it is Satan who is the victim. And was he not shamed and humiliated through his being forced out of heaven? Who could be so arrogant as to condemn someone forever? This is pride and the definition of pride is: "the love of one's own excellence." Who loves his own excellence more than God? Is this not the opposite of humility?

So let’s not be so hard on poor old Lucifer, the jilted lover. Instead of letting our fears chain him down to the underworld, let’s show him some grace.

After all, that which we condemn in others, we condemn in ourselves.



Tuesday, August 18, 2009

The Greatest Miracle

The Greatest Miracle

“Miracles happen, not in opposition of nature,
but in opposition of what we know of nature.”

- St. Augustine

What is the greatest miracle? When I posed this question in a chat room I got the usual answers: love; children (but not adults? How very odd); the human body. I’ve even read that the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus is the Greatest Miracle, or any one of his miracles (the raising of Lazarus or the healing of the sick). People purportedly see miracles everyday (presumably acts of kindness, or the answered prayer to some illness). The problem with picking any one, single miracle is that all of them will exclude another. You would have to pick something that is all-inclusive. One cannot pick ‘Man’ as an answer, because it excludes animals.


First we must define what a miracle is. A Miracle is 1) an event that appears inexplicable by the laws of nature and so is held to be supernatural in origin or an act of God.
2) One that excites admiring awe.

To answer this question I turn to Mark Twain and his work titled Letters From the Earth (Read it online here: http://www.positiveatheism.org/hist/twainlfe.htm). The Greatest Miracle is that of a self-regulating universe. Twain explains what a self-regulating universe this way:

"The invention and introduction of automatic, unsupervised, self-regulating law for the government of those myriads of whirling and racing suns and worlds!"

"That is it!" said Satan. "You perceive that it is a stupendous idea. Nothing approaching it has been evolved from the Master Intellect before. Law -- Automatic Law -- exact and unvarying Law -- requiring no watching, no correcting, no readjusting while the eternities endure! He said those countless vast bodies would plunge through the wastes of Space ages and ages, at unimaginable speed, around stupendous orbits, yet never collide, and never lengthen nor shorten their orbital periods by so much as the hundredth part of a second in two thousand years! That is the new miracle, and the greatest of all -- Automatic Law! And He gave it a name -- the LAW OF NATURE -- and said Natural Law is the LAW OF GOD -- interchangeable names for one and the same thing."

It is gravity, friction, inertia and so on. It is consistent. A star will burn for millions of years and eventually die out, but not unexpectedly. It is a measurable reality. And this applies to every star. There are no exceptions. No unseen celestial hand waving a star back into existence, or out of existence because it serves “his plan or will”.

What is available to one is available to all. This is the spiritual meaning behind a self-regulating universe. There are no exceptions. No judgements. Rain does not decide (does not judge) who is more deserving of its water. It simply rains because that is what it is programmed to do. Wayne Dyer explains that electricity has always existed. We just never had the ability to connect to it.

A self-regulating universe is also the perfect argument against chaos or that this life we live is completely random. If life were random or truly chaotic, then a mortal woman would occasionally give birth to something other than a human child. If life was random and without order, a woman would (and thankfully not) give birth to a ‘68 Buick. Or a pebble, or a Rhino. The possibilities would be endless.

If the processes behind life were random, walls would wink in and out of existence (without the aid of drugs), our solar system would increase and decrease the number of planets it has…oh wait…bad example. Sorry Pluto (too soon?). A whale and a pot of petunias would suddenly fall from the sky, a million miles away, onto some alien world. (That was a tip of my hat to Douglas Adams)

Gravity is available to all, without exception. Even in Science Fiction, the idea of using anti-gravity devices to fly through space works on the principle that gravity exists and is working all the time. These devices simply would not work without gravity, nor would they be necessary.
I often think of my poor vision and the need (or reliance) on corrective lenses. Corrective lenses! They do no such thing. My glasses have never corrected my vision. Crutch-lenses would be more accurate! I do not believe I was predestined to have poor eyesight, nor that this is some punishment where I’ve been centered out due to Adam and Eve’s original sin (refer to my 2 posts on Original Sin for all that business). Some, as of yet, unknown factors caused something to happen to these incredibly complex organs to be somewhat faulty.

Yet as a part of the aforementioned Greatest Miracle, if some factor caused this nearsightedness, it stands to reason that there are is a way to fix it. It stands to reason that the effects can truly be corrected and more importantly avoided for future generations. But then, where would the fun be in that?

So if perfect vision is available to you, then it is available to me as well. Which is a very Buddhist concept, is it not? Consider the Four Noble Truths.

1) Suffering exists.
2) All suffering has an origin
3) All suffering can end.
4) There is a path to the cessation of suffering

Who has prayed for perfect vision and actually received it? This kind of prayer is not the answer, it is a passive way to go through life. But to believe that there is a path out of every kind of suffering, ah, then there is an active participant in this great miracle.

So does this miracle actually kill God? Does it do away with the wonder and awe of creation? According to the second definition of what a miracle is (one that excites admiring awe), I would say no. It actually increases the wonder and awe of the universe. That by throwing a bunch of atoms together, I can have thoughts in my head. Or fingers to type this blog. It staggers and humbles me. That planets maintain their perfect orbits until something interferes with them, this is amazing to me. It amazes me that whatever it is that grows your fingernails, also grows mine (and let me tell you, I am constantly challenging on a daily basis whatever it is that make my fingernails grow). This is why I believe that the biblical idea of Heaven is so erroneous. It is based on special circumstances. In my reality, heaven is available to everyone, just like rain is. The conditions just have to be right.

Does it remove all the mystery from it? Does this suggest that miracles are common-place? When miracles become everyday experiences, instead of rare occurrences, man can truly call himself enlightened.

“Perchance blindness is but a dark thought that can be overcome by a burning thought. Perchance a withered limb is but idleness that can be quickened by energy. And perhaps the devils, these restless elements in our life, are driven out by the angels of peace and serenity.”
Kahlil Gibran’s 'Jesus the Son of Man'

Today's lesson.... confidence , its all bull@$&%

Okay, I came across this wonderful gem during my travels and thought it was worth posting here:

Have you ever wondered where confidence comes from? I believe that it stems from the thought of accomplishing something that you are proud of, a feeling of content , satisfaction of a job well done. Well that felling my friends is all an illusion. Because confidence has its own nemesis. Fear and doubt. They are powerful forces on their own but when those evil demons combine, they leave nothing behind, but bits and pieces of your self-esteem in the path of destruction. The path being the task at hand or the objective, it may lead you in many directions. Like a tornado picking up momentum and strength.

Fear feeding off of doubt. Doubt fueling up fear, you ultimately know that it does not matter what path you choose or which way you go, the tornado will find you and blow away all your hopes, dreams and yes destroying the very fragile and delicate confidence that you have managed to rebuild from the previous storm. So is one to be blamed for abandoning and seeking shelter elsewhere, when time and time again the very foundation on what that person is built on, has been vaporized and leaving it vulnerable to even the slightest breeze?

Indeed, can one be blamed for seeking shelter elsewhere? Of course the Macphisto in me does wonder: why does one build a house in Tornado Alley? And of course, is this true confidence? Once something is built, so does the satisfaction of a job well done exist, even when the Tornado comes and smashes into it.
"This is going to end in disaster, and you have no one to blame but yourself."

Saturday, August 15, 2009

The Wonderful Madness of Don Quixote


The Wonderful Madness of Don Quixote, Man of La Mancha

What is madness?

The play Man of La Mancha is a story about madness. It is the madness that can be found in reality as well as the madness of imagination and fantasy. It is about being imprisoned by each kind of madness and who is to say which of the two is more preferable? Who is to say which kind of madness is true reality?

Miguel de Cervantes is a poet / actor who is imprisoned by the Spanish Inquisition. While imprisoned he is put on trial by his fellow prisoners. Cervantes' defence is in the form of a play, in which Cervantes takes the role of Alonso Quijana, an old gentleman who has lost his mind and now believes that he should go forth as a knight-errant. Quijana renames himself Don Quixote de La Mancha (means parched earth in Arabic), and sets out to find adventures with his "squire" Sancho Panza.

Don Quixote’s adventures has him battle the Enchanter (but is in reality a windmill); he comes across a Castle (nothing more than an inn in which Quioxote does not see that the chapel of the castle is nothing more than a stable); he seeks the Golden Helmet of Mambrino (a shaving basin) and wears it with pride. He finds beauty in Aldonza, a peasant of the inn who will sleep with anyone for money and he calls her Dulcinea (sweetness), a veritable Magdalene.

As the musical progresses, we meet Quixote’s niece who has sought out the local priest to help her poor old uncle. The niece tries to convince the priest that she is “Only thinking of him”. Yet she is in fact more concerned about what her fiancée will think. Such is her madness.

Amongst Quixote’s adventures, he seeks a token from his one true love Dulcinea. In return he gets a dirty dishrag that he sees as a silken scarf. Aldonza is furious with Quixote, uncomfortable with his talk of beauty and purity when in fact she has been with every man in town. But her doubt begins as she sings:

Why does he do the things he does?
Why does he do these things?
Why does he march
Through that dream that he's in,
Covered with glory and rusty old tin?
Why does he live in a world that can't be,
And what does he want of me...
What does he want of me?

Why does he say the things he says?
Why does he say these things?
"Sweet Dulcinea" and "missive" and such,
"Nethermost hem of thy garment I touch,"
No one can be what he wants me to be,
Oh, what does he want of me...
What does he want of me?

Doesn't he know
He'll be laughed at wherever he'll go?
And why I'm not laughing myself...
I don't know.

Why does he want the things he wants?
Why does he want these things?
Why does he batter at walls that won't break?
Why does he give when it's natural to take?
Where does he see all the good he can see,
And what does he want of me?
What does he want of me?

Is it madness to not see how you will be laughed at wherever you go? Is it madness to give when it’s natural to take? And isn't it fascinating that Aldonza is so unwilling to accept these gifts that Quixote freely offers?

Finally Aldonza confronts Quixote and his response is the famous ‘Impossible Dream’ and it is here where a seed of his own madness is planted in her:

To dream ... the impossible dream ...
To fight ... the unbeatable foe ...
To bear ... with unbearable sorrow ...
To run ... where the brave dare not go ...
To right ... the unrightable wrong ...
To love ... pure and chaste from afar ...
To try ... when your arms are too weary ...
To reach ... the unreachable star ...

This is my quest, to follow that star ...
No matter how hopeless, no matter how far ...
To fight for the right, without question or pause ...
To be willing to march into Hell, for a Heavenly cause ...

And I know if I'll only be true, to this glorious quest,
That my heart will lie will lie peaceful and calm,
when I'm laid to my rest ...
And the world will be better for this:
That one man, scorned and covered with scars,
Still strove, with his last ounce of courage,
To reach ... the unreachable star ...

The story interchanges between Don Quixote’s fantastical world and the ‘real’ world of Cervantes imprisonment. One of the prisoners, known only as The Duke, has been imprisoned for treason, by selling lies to those “too stupid enough to believe it”. The Duke is the voice of harsh reality. He scoffs at the story of Don Quixote. After another prisoner is taken away to be ‘questioned’ by the Inquisition, the Duke turns his scorn to Cervantes.

The Duke: But do you see Cervantes, there is a difference between reality and delusion
and the difference between these prisoners and your men of lunacy?

Cervantes: I would say, rather, men whose illusions were very real.

The Duke: Well that’s the same thing isn’t it, really?
Why are you poets so fascinated with madmen?

Cervantes: We have much in common.

The Duke: You both turn your backs on life.

Cervantes: We both select from life.

The Duke: A man has to come to terms with life as it is.

Cervantes: Life as it is. I have lived for over 40 years and I have
seen ‘life as it is’. Pain. Misery. Cruelty beyond belief.
I have heard all the voices of God’s noblest
creature moan from bundles of filth in the street.

I’ve been a soldier, and a slave. I’ve seen my comrades fall in battle
or die more slowly under the lash in Africa. I’ve held them at the
last moment. These were men who saw ‘life as it is’.
But they died despairing. No Glory. No brave last words.
Only in their eyes, filled with confusion, questionin “why?”.
I do not think they were asking why they were dying,
but why they had ever lived.

When life itself seems lunatic, who knows where madness lies?
Perhaps to be too practical is madness, to surrender dreams –
this may be madness. To seek treasure where there is only trash –
to much sanity may be madness!

And maddest of all, to see ‘life as it is’ and not as it should be.

Yet there is a dangerous side to Quixote’s madness. Together with the help of Sancho and Aldonza (who finally sides with the knight-errant), they defeat a band of muleteers. But Quixote announces that his foes must now be tended to, for that is what chivalry calls for. Aldonza agrees to dress the wounds herself. After Quixote takes his leave, Aldonza is beaten and raped by the gang of muleteers. A terrible price for conversion. A terrible price, for another’s madness.

One must decide for themselves if the ending is tragedy or success. If it is madness or sanity. Quixote is ambushed by his niece’s fiancée pretending to be the Enchanter. He and his small band have huge mirrored shields. Quixote is forced to see himself ‘as he really is’ through his reflection in several mirrors. The sun, the light, is blinding. You might say he is blinded by the reality of what he truly is.

When we see him again, he is in bed, now an old man and dying. Don Quioxote is dead. His adventures nothing more than an odd dream. Everyone is pleased that the old man has come back to his ‘senses’, with the exception of Sancho who greatly misses their misadventures. It is only when Aldonza forces herself into his bedchamber and helps the old man remember the words to the Impossible Dream. Slowly, Quixote is resurrected and sings full-throated the Impossible Dream.

But his time has come, and the old man dies in mid-song as Don Quixote, Man of La Mancha. Is this tragedy? Is it a loss that he recovered from reality back into madness only to die? Perhaps it is Aldonza who answers this question best. Sancho calls her by name, but Aldonza corrects him: “Call me Dulcinea”.

It is easy to see the many similarities this story has with the story of Jesus. Death and Resurrection; salvation for his followers (Aldonza and Sancho); The Impossible Dream can be seen as Quixote’s Sermon on the Mount.

Whatever you believe madness to be, I think the world could use more of Don Quixote’s brand of madness.

(There is a movie version of the play made in 1962 starring Peter O’Toole and Sophia Lauren. Although some changes were made, it is still very good. Personally, I don’t think you can beat the live performances of the play.)

Monday, August 10, 2009

Suggested Reading on Your Spiritual Journey


Suggested Reading on Your Spiritual Journey

The following is a list of many (but not all!) of my favourite books that have helped me immensely on my Spiritual journey. It is booked-ended by two of my favourites: A Course in Miracles and Star Wars.


A Course in Miracles

Controversial to say the least, this book is not an easy read, yet worth every effort in the end. This book explains the true meaning behind miracles, the crucifixion and so on.

"You do not ask too much of life, but far too little."

"I can change all thoughts that hurt."


The Bhagavad-Gita

This Hindu text records a conversation between Krishna and Arjuna taking place on the battlefield. Arjuna has become filled with doubt and morally has become confused. Arjuna then is taught about the soul and dharma.

"A man should raise himself, and should not demean himself; for he is the friend of his self, and he its enemy."


The Analects - Confucius

"Do not do to others what you would not like yourself."

When reading this quote it is important to know that Confucius was born over 500 years before Jesus. Confucius thought of himself as a transmitter who invented nothing. His teachings encourage people to think deeply for themselves.



The Spirit of Tao - Thomas Cleary

The Tao, an ancient Chinese philosophy refers to 'The Path' or 'The Way'.

"Walk slowly at a relaxed pace and you won’t stumble. Sleep soundly and you won’t fret through the night. If you think about the past, your former self will not die. If you think about the future, the road seems long and hard to traverse."



Siddhartha - Herman Hesse

A fictional telling of how the Prince, Siddhartha, follows a spiritual journey to enlightenment and became Buddha.

"What a path it has been! I have had to experience so much stupidity, so many vices, so much error, so much nausea, disillusionment and sorrow, just in order to become a child again and begin anew."




The Power of Myth - Joseph Campbell and Bill Moyers

Although I've not read this book I have watched the 6 part Public Television documentary. Bill Moyers interviews Joseph Campbell on The Hero's Journey, the messages in myths, following your bliss and so on.

"When people find out what it is that’s ticking in them, they get straightened out."



The Prophet - Kahlil Gibran
The little Lebanese poet's writing is simply beautiful. This book is known as Gibran's masterpiece is one of the most moving books ever written. Keep in mind that no matter what book of his you pick up, you can't be disappointed.

"And when one of you falls down he falls for those behind him, a caution against the stumbling stone. Ay, and he falls for those ahead of him, who though faster and surer of foot, yet removed not the stumbling stone."

Jesus the Son of Man - Kahlil Gibran

A fictional account of Jesus from the people who knew him. Each short chapter is a letter written from the point of view of many different people, from Jesus' grandmother, Anna, Mary Magdalene to Pontius Pilate. Reading this one wonders if Gibran was actually there...

"I alone love the unseen in you."



Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance - Robert M. Pirsig
This book nearly knocked me over when I first read it. Is it possible to think yourself into insanity? Speaking from experience, I say "Yes!"
The book subtitled 'an inquiry into values', describes in the first person a motorcycle road trip the author takes with his son, Chris. It really has nothing to do with motorcycles. There is a wealth of practical discussions in this book, striking a balance between romance and reality.

"We have artists with no scientific knowledge and scientists with no artistic knowledge and both with no spiritual sense of gravity at all…the time for real
unification of art and technology is really long overdue."


Lila - Robert M. Pirsig
This book is an inquiry into morals. Pirsig studies the hippie movement who perceived the flaws in both social and intellectual patterns, sought to transcend them, but failed to provide a stable replacement, degenerating instead into lower level biological patterns called free love.

"They love you for being what they want to be but they hate you for being what they’re not."


The Last Temptation of Christ - Nikos Kazantzakis
Most people remember Martin Scorsese's film based upon this book. Probably more controversial than A Course in Miracles, this FICTIONAL telling of Jesus' life offers Jesus as human, rather than God-like. Personally this telling gives me more hope and I think makes the message that much stronger.

"If I were fire, I would burn; if I were a woodcutter, I would strike. But I am a heart, and I love."


Saint Francis - Nikos Kazantzakis

Another fictional retelling of a famous historical figure.

"There is no harsher means of punishment, than to answer malice with kindness."

"Hell is nothing more than the antechamber of heaven."



Black Elk Speaks - John G. Neihardt

A 1932 story of an Ogala Sioux Medicine Man. Plagued by visions of his people being overcome by the White Man, Black Elk feels as though he has been charged with his people's salvation.

"And it seemed I did not belong to my people. They were almost like strangers. I would be out alone away from the village and the other boys, and I would look around to the four quarters, thinking of my vision and wishing I could get back there again. I would go home to eat, but I could not make myself eat much; and my father and mother thought that I was sick yet; but I was not. I was only
homesick for the place where I had been."

Available to read on line here:
http://www.firstpeople.us/articles/Black-Elk-Speaks/Black-Elk-Speaks-Index.html


The Legend of Bagger Vance - Stephen Pressfield

Bagger Vance is a mysterious traveler carrying a suitcase who appears out of the darkness and has come to coach and teach Junuh (the name is a reference to Arjuna in the Bhagavad-Gita), not about Golf, but about how to live.

"I’ve stood across…from men and women who hated me. But I…I couldn’t hate them…They were just me. Me with another man’s face."


Star Wars - George Lucas

I will often reference Star Wars, specifically more of the movies than the novelization’s. There are many reasons to enjoy Star Wars from the surface level of special effects to the hyper-kinetic light saber battles. But for me, I love the layers upon layers within all six of the movies. Themes of duality; spirit vs. technology; realizing that all possibilities are open to all of us (the Good side and the Bad side); and especially redemption. The list is endless.

"Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter."